Monday, March 26, 2012

Neighborhood Truce

Now that the weather in our area has warmed, the neighbors are out. Our next door neighbors have children that are a bit younger than Random Guy.  They seem to play well together most times. But sometimes things go wrong.
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It seems since the neighborhood adults know that Random Guy has a bit of a social delay that he is at fault when an incident or disagreement happens between the children. They think he is taking the bullying behavior that has happened at school to him and turning it on their kids. What is really happening is the other kids are picking on Random Guy and then when he reacts badly, they say he was the one who went too far. It has gotten bad enough that the neighbor kids are exagerating and lying to cover up how they goaded Random Guy into reacting to their taunts.

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It doesn't help that Random Guy plays too rough with SensiGirl. I know its normal boy rough housing, but growing up with only one sister I am not used to all that wrestling type play. So I may assume that Random Guy was playing too rough. It also sometimes takes a while to get the whole story from Random Guy, without the added pressure of having to explain himself.

I  know what it feels like to be frightened for you child when another child is threatening.  Random Guy and the Girlie down the street have had it in for each other almost since the get go. Girlie decided that Random Guy was a bad person and has been coloring her interactions with him for years. One day Random Guy was  taking pictures with his new camera. Girlie decided that behavior was spying on her and announced to him she was going to go home and get a knife and come back and get him.  Whoa....that really was crossing the line for me. I kinda freaked. I sat outside with Random Guy and when Girlie came by I told her that the next time she threatens to harm my Random Guy with a weapon I will be calling her mother and then the police. Girlie's mom and I talked the next day, we worked it out for now.  So I get it about a parent hearing someone was hit in the face, well those alarms go off in our heads to protect our kids. When I was approached before I could get Random Guys side of the story, I told our next door neighbors that we shouldn't have the boys playing together when NeighborBoy has guests.
We all need to take time to get the whole story, and I am still working on that skill. Random Guy explained how he was taunted and pushed and he pushed back in defence but didn't hit anyone in the face. Let's also not always assume it is the different kid on the block who is up to no good.  For now we have a truce.

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